TheSidewinder Posted March 8, 2009 Posted March 8, 2009 I need to bitch. I'm sorry, I know I'm lucky to have a job; the economy sucks, and people are hurting. Most of you know I'm a commercial pilot. Picture Quagmire minus the sexcapades. I checked our company's computer system and found out I'm flying today with one of the most hated people we have. The guy is just a flaming arsehole. Imagine being jammed in a closet for 8 hours with someone you despise, and the feeling is mutual. Oh yes, you get 2 potty breaks of 2 minutes each. Kill me. Or tell me to stop whining. Either would be welcome. I will spend eight hours daydreaming about what sort of noxious chemical I could slip into his coffee... nothing lethal, and all in pure theory/fantasy. Are you in the left seat? If so tell him to STFU while you're in charge, because his monotonous drivel makes you fall asleep at the stick. But if you're in the right seat...... well... that's a problem.
Pretty green flame Posted March 8, 2009 Author Posted March 8, 2009 Does this rag smell like Ether/Chloroform? :D Hahahaha, my god, almost fell out of my chair, you sir, deserve a prize for this statement
Mumbles Posted March 8, 2009 Posted March 8, 2009 I've actually asked that in a serious sense before. I asked someone in my lab if the beaker of solvent smelled like chloroform. Once we realized what I had asked, we had a good laugh, possibly partly fume induced.
Miech Posted March 8, 2009 Posted March 8, 2009 I will spend eight hours daydreaming about what sort of noxious chemical I could slip into his coffee... nothing lethal, and all in pure theory/fantasy.Sodium telluride (insert evil smiley here). An amount of 0,01 gram is enough to make someone smell like garlic for some months. I can not be held responsible for the results .
andyboy Posted March 8, 2009 Posted March 8, 2009 Sodium telluride (insert evil smiley here). An amount of 0,01 gram is enough to make someone smell like garlic for some months. I can not be held responsible for the results . Where I lived before everybody smelled like garlic. I was intrigued by your answer so I had to read a bit about it, it seems like it is used in blasting caps (no more info then that though). It makes sense, where I used to live there where many Arabs/Muslims and everyone smelled like garlic, it's so obvious now, they where making blasting caps.
TheSidewinder Posted March 8, 2009 Posted March 8, 2009 Splash a little DMSO on your skin. You won't SMELL like Garlic, you'll TASTE Garlic for the next few hours. And damned strong, too. There's a story behind how I know that, too.
Yankie Posted March 9, 2009 Posted March 9, 2009 Splash a little DMSO on your skin. You won't SMELL like Garlic, you'll TASTE Garlic for the next few hours. And damned strong, too. There's a story behind how I know that, too. Care to share this story? I am sure we are all intrigued.
TheSidewinder Posted March 9, 2009 Posted March 9, 2009 OK, why not..... I was on a pack horse fishing trip, in the Bob Marshall Wilderness Area in Montana, about 25-30 years ago. A week before I left, I was tubing in the Apple River in Wisconsin. Going down a small waterfall, I smashed one knee against a rock. Badly. Swelled up like a softball. Hurt like hell the day we flew to Montana. The first day on the horse was long and rough. At the end of the day, I actually needed help getting down. The head wrangler looked at my knee later that night and winced. Then he pulled out his "horse liniment"... A mixture of original Absorbine Horse Liniment (not Absorbine Jr. which is for Athlete's Foot in humans) and DMSO. They added the DMSO to get the liniment into the joint itself because it worked a lot better that way. He said all the hired hands used it for wrenched joints and so forth, and recommended I use it. At that point I was in so much pain, that had he suggested amputation I would have likely agreed. He warned me, "You'll taste garlic, by the way". I was like, WTF? He said it was the DMSO that did it, but didn't know why. So I slathered this noxious brew on my bad knee. Sure enough, in about 5 minutes I honestly thought I had just eaten several heads of raw Garlic. However, within an hour my knee felt a LOT better. I put some more on the next morning before breakfast. More garlic. Breakfast tasted pretty good actually. Just a little.... strange. Same regimen when we broke for lunch. By the end of that day, I could get off the horse by myself and the swelling was WAY down. Anecdotal evidence, but for me it sure as hell worked. (DMSO isn't certified for human use anymore, by the way. They found out it was a rather nasty carcinogen.)
Mumbles Posted March 9, 2009 Posted March 9, 2009 Yes, DMSO penetrates the skin very well, taking what ever is dissolved in it with it easily. I think it works like soap in reverse, where the non-polar part is on the outside so it passes the lipid membranes easily, and the inside is polar so it can dissolve things in there. It makes a great chemical reaction solvent, but also greatly increases the possibility of poisoning yourself.
flying fish Posted March 9, 2009 Posted March 9, 2009 Arggg... I left my tablet pen back at my parents' house. Now my tablet has reverted to an ordinary laptop, and I'll be taking notes the old fashioned way (stone-age style) for at least the next week. Well, my roommate's tablet just self-destructed, maybe I'll ask if I can borrow her pen, assuming she wasn't planning on sending it in right away. (PS, I know tablet pens are actually called "styluses", but I'm not going to say it because it sounds like something an arrogant new-yorker would use).
Swede Posted March 9, 2009 Posted March 9, 2009 Well, I survived it, as I knew I would. Not as bad as I thought it'd be, mainly because we both just kept our mouths shut. I spent the whole time watching the groundspeed, and when we hit a 100 knot headwind, it was painful. Anyway, it's done, and I probably won't see the guy again for some months. There are true stories of flight attendants spiking Captain's coffee when there is a bit of hatred going on. The classic and most used adulterant is visine. It is apparently a powerful laxative and will really mess up your system for quite a while. It's hard to prove, and stuff like that happened more often years ago. Nowadays, there'd be little humor in it, and probably jail time if caught. Like the guy who spiked the baby bottle with xanax to try and put the screaming kid to sleep... I wonder what happened to him?
andyboy Posted March 9, 2009 Posted March 9, 2009 Is it true that the pilot and the co-pilot can't order the same meal?
Brakkie Posted March 9, 2009 Posted March 9, 2009 Yes it's true. If the food somehow causes food poisoning there will be at least someone left that's able to fly. The chances of them both getting food poisoning on the same trip is much smaller.
Swede Posted March 9, 2009 Posted March 9, 2009 You are correct... it is in the regs, but ignored regularly! I have never gotten sick in nearly 20 years, including eating things like leafy greens from Guatemala, but I guess there is always a chance. What happens is this - The Purser (the flight attendant who serves first class) generally offers two choices. One is almost always chicken, the other almost always fish (how cliched is that!?) The passengers, fearing the stereotyped poisoned fish, usually choose chicken, leaving excess fish. We get a call - "Can I have one of your chicken plates? That leaves salmon..." And we're happy, because the chicken sucks, and the fish is usually really good. So if you ever get a chance to go 1st class, order the fish - yummy, except for the Hg.
flying fish Posted March 10, 2009 Posted March 10, 2009 You are probably sick of people quoting airplane by now but... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vosq85B_lMk...feature=related And not really related, but also... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3bGv6Ijf1aU
WarezWally Posted March 21, 2009 Posted March 21, 2009 Its been one hell of a ride, a five year long ride infact: Battlestar Galactica has come to an end, probably one of if not the best show I have ever watched.
TheSidewinder Posted March 21, 2009 Posted March 21, 2009 Saw a bit about that in the newspaper yesterday. One of our astronauts (Garrett Reisman) is going to be a guest on that final show, assuming the scene doesn't end up on the cutting room floor. Here's a news brief about it: http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,509905,00.html
WarezWally Posted March 27, 2009 Posted March 27, 2009 Got done for drinking in an alcohol free zone outside a bottle shop with a bunch of mates a few hours ago Fucking bullshit if you ask me, coppers were a bunch of dicks telling one of my friends to "fu**off" when he questioned the officer who was writing me a ticket. There were no signs informing us of the alcohol free zone. The police officers were absolute wankers. Looks like I get a stupid find in the mail sometime, I couldn't care less about the small about of money it will cost me. Its the fact that the police fined me when they had better things to do and they made me tip out my beer onto the ground. Got into my mates car and picked up some more beer anyway My respect of police officers has shrunk to -50
optimus Posted March 27, 2009 Posted March 27, 2009 (edited) My GF just got back from the Health and Safety labs deep in the English countryside. They were taking photos of 'stuff being blown up' with a radio-controlled surveillance drone! Damnit I need a new job! I wanna play with drones and explosives! Edited March 27, 2009 by optimus
Richtee Posted March 27, 2009 Posted March 27, 2009 There were no signs informing us of the alcohol free zone.Soo... go to court. Pisses them off too, sometimes it's scheduled on their day/time off ;{)
WarezWally Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 Not worth it, costs me to much money and I have to take the day off to do it. I could understand them fining me if I was drunk being an idiot but these guys were out looking for a fight. I think the fine is under $100 anyway, I hope
Brakkie Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 I don't know how it goes down under but over here in Holland I protest whenever I get the chance. The thing is when you protest against your fine 9 out of 10 times the cops don't show up in court. This means it's only gonna be you that's gonna tell your story and the judge will most likely agree with you since there are no arguements from the cops. I've had a few tickets that got dismissed in court because the cop didn't show, made a mistake or in a similar case to yours, there wasn't a sign saying it was forbidden to drink alcohol. I'd go to court if I was you, but it's your call.
mike_au Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 I think we have it even easier in one regard, if the other party doesn't turn up I believe they will find in your favour by default, you don't even have to tell your story. The down side is that they don't say "Turn up on Tuesday at 2pm" they say "Turn up on Tuesday, if we run out of time then you can come back Wednesday". So yes, challenging a small fine will probably be enough to get you out of it, but it will cost you a day or three sitting around the court.
WarezWally Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 I don't even know what I'm being fined with, hopefully I get something in the mail telling me I have 21 days to cough up $55 or $110. Hopefully I don't get a court summons, means I have to waste a day, get all dressed up and spend 30 seconds in a court telling a judge how sorry I am only to get the same small fine (or nothing seeing as this whole thing is a joke).
Richtee Posted March 28, 2009 Posted March 28, 2009 I don't even know what I'm being fined with, hopefully I get something in the mail telling me I have 21 days to cough up $55 or $110. Hopefully I don't get a court summons, means I have to waste a day, get all dressed up and spend 30 seconds in a court telling a judge how sorry I am only to get the same small fine (or nothing seeing as this whole thing is a joke). Be pro-active..call the court and find out. It's in your best interest.
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